The good with the bad

So lately I have been taking the good with the bad.
I find that I do often make myself available to please the world, and often keep myself short changed.  I had a good friend point out to me just the other day that, I complain about the same situations over and over, but somehow they involve different people, but the outcome is always quite the same.
I spend time thinking about what the "Future" should be like, remember thou, I don't plan anything... for every plan I make, there often is a counter plan or a wrench that sabotages the vision so I just roll with it.

We have been dealing with some pretty unreeling behavior lately with the the boys, one mostly.  It seems as if he has found his inner beast, since I don't believe in any form of violence, I am at my wits end... the only form of punishment that seems to work to combat his combativeness, is to just hold him tight, let him fight it out... once he has found his "lost mind" he always regroups and we all feel better, but the hard part is the fact that it is even happening.
I swear, I always thought these two boys would always be kind and loving, and they are for the most part, but, when they get angry... look out.
I totally see the inherited trait of rage... yes rage.  When I was little, I was the same way, big difference is how my parents dealt with me.. wrong or right it effected me, and still does till this day.
As a parent now, I have choices to end the cycle... so far so good.
I just have to say it's tough.. soooooooooo tough, especially when this little person you love so much is trying to punch you in your face..
totally heart breaking.